😶 Dissociation or Zoning Out: Your Mind's Way of Protecting You (Until It's Not)

We’ve all had moments where we feel spaced out, disconnected, or like we’re watching our life from the outside. Maybe you drove somewhere and didn’t remember how you got there, or found yourself zoning out during a stressful conversation. These are examples of dissociation—a psychological process that can actually be a brilliant, protective tool... until it starts to interfere with daily life.

What is Dissociation?

Dissociation is the mind’s way of giving you a break when something feels too overwhelming. It can feel like:

• Spacing out or losing chunks of time

• Feeling numb or emotionally detached

• Watching yourself from outside your body

• Feeling disconnected from your surroundings

• A sense that things aren’t real (also called derealization)

In the moment, dissociation can be incredibly useful. For survivors of trauma, especially, it’s often the brain’s emergency exit—a way to mentally step away from an unbearable experience when there’s no other option.

When Dissociation Becomes a Problem

The issue arises when dissociation becomes your mind’s go-to response, even when the danger is long gone. What once helped you survive can start to interfere with relationships, work, and your ability to feel connected to yourself and others.

Some signs that dissociation might be crossing into unhelpful territory include:

• Frequently feeling detached or "not present"

• Struggling to remember conversations or events

• Difficulty feeling emotions, even in important moments

• Feeling disconnected from your body or identity

• Using dissociation as a way to avoid discomfort or emotions

When dissociation becomes chronic, it can feel like you’re living life on autopilot—safe, maybe, but also disconnected and alone.

The Roots of Dissociation

Dissociation is especially common in people with a history of trauma, such as childhood abuse, sexual assault, or chronic stress. It can also show up in people who weren’t allowed to express emotions growing up, or in those who had to suppress their identity to fit in or stay safe (something that’s particularly familiar for many in the BIPOC, immigrant, and LGBTQ+ communities).

Healing from Dissociation

The good news is that dissociation isn’t permanent—and it doesn’t mean you’re broken. With support, you can learn to come back to yourself and begin to feel safe in your body and your life again.

Some helpful practices include:

• Grounding techniques: Using your senses to reconnect to the present moment (e.g., noticing five things you see, four you can touch, etc.)

• Therapy: Trauma-informed therapy—especially approaches like EMDR, somatic experiencing, or parts work—can help you process the original trauma and develop new coping strategies.

• Body connection: Gentle movement, yoga, or breathwork can help you slowly reconnect to your physical self in safe, manageable ways.

• Psychoeducation: Learning about your nervous system and how dissociation works can reduce shame and increase self-compassion.

  
  

You Weren’t Weak—You Were Smart

If you dissociate, it doesn’t mean you’re weak or damaged. It means your mind did what it had to do to protect you. And now, as an adult, you get to learn how to live in your body and your life more fully—with support, gentleness, and choice.

If this resonates with you, you’re not alone.

Healing from dissociation takes time, but it’s absolutely possible—and you don’t have to do it by yourself. If you’re ready to feel more present, connected, and safe in your own skin, reach out. I’d be honored to support you on your journey.

Let’s take the next step together. Work with one of our amazing therapists, https://www.pacificmft.com/therapist-info/meet-our-team or contact info@pacificmft.com 310-612-2998